"Life, friends, is boring."

Places.

2008-08-22T23:40:00.003-04:00

This was the jist of a story told by a seven year old, over dinner at Joe's Crab Shack (while waiting for the round of 'paint your own Rice Krispie Treat crab' desserts to arrive). It was improv. Has he been reading my Russell Edson?.

One time, there were people who went to some places. Place #1 was a place. Place #2 was full of places. Place #3 was full of nothing. Place #4 was full of toilets.

Except it was even better than that. Tried to remember it all, but had nothing to write with.

I think he was talking about the mall. Not the Mall, but the mall.

Dear Dave,

2008-08-14T21:18:00.006-04:00

Last night I dreamed that me and you had a wizard battle. We didn't look like wizards, but we could do magic. All our oldest friends and family came to watch, because there was a small chance we might die. They all stayed at the Hilton, and we were able to get them a special rate because of this being such a big situation. The location we picked was a smallish canyon (the walls stretched maybe 20 or 30 feet over our heads) and it had a creek of lava running along one side. Workers in charge of setting up for events had rolled out green indoor/outdoor carpeting and set a while pergola on top of that and, underneath, a lot of white chairs. In the evening and just before the battle, (purple sky set against red canyon) we were discussing logistics and I realized I had forgotten how to do magic. This magic was elemental, you said. I had to be touching one of the elements in order to cast a spell. I poured my bottled water on the ground, scooped up some mud, and mashed together a miniature mud golem so I could bring him alive to fight for me, but he wasn't holding together very well. Trying to do magic felt exactly the same as when I had tried as a child. I held my breath and tensed all the muscles in my body. I stared at the mud man so hard and didn't blink. All my blood rushed to my head. The straining was just as terrible as it had always been.

O I am reading at this:

2008-01-06T15:46:00.000-05:00

I will be reading poems about death (maybe dressed as a zombie), and my hair will be big.

I have a blog now.

2008-01-06T11:47:00.001-05:00

Shut up.

Everybody else is doing it.

When I realize how long the internet has been waiting for me to add my life to it I think I am glad I can tell it about myself finally.